The Giants 2015 Season: Wrestling With A Million Emotions Like A Crazy Person

Any kind of sports fandom is truly maddening. It took me a long time to acknowledge that, but damn, is it true. Despite this reality, baseball fandom is my life. Giants fandom is in my blood. It's easy to forget about the maddening part during blissful moments, but it's there, always lurking. Right now I'd describe my Giants fandom as just that: maddening.

Last night's Giants game left me with only one question: "What is baseball?" I asked this due to the fact that the Giants should not have won last night's game. The lineup made no sense whatsoever to anyone who knows a lick about baseball. It was a Nicholas Cage movie made within at least the last decade. It was ridiculous. Chris Heston threw a ton of pitches, but somehow amassed a lot of strikeouts and was effectively wild. Ehire Adrianza walked three (!?!?!?!) times. Buster Posey was not in the lineup. Angel Pagan homered. But last night made me love this stupid Giants team in what can really only be articulated as a stupid season.

I had figured that by late September, the Giants would be so far out of the division that the end of the season would be, dare I say, pleasant. At least it wouldn't be stressful, or, as previously mentioned, maddening. It wouldn't be the most dangerous possibility of all: hopeful. Here we are, with 13 games left, and the Giants are 6 back of the Dodgers in the NL West. As for the Wild Card, I wouldn't even want the Giants to get mixed up in that, because it's too good as is. Plus, the Giants are stupid behind in that race; they see the dust cloud and know that bus is never coming back. But (but!!) the NL West division remains a hail-mary long shot. I wish I could stop believing. I want nothing more than to close the door on this silly Giants season and move on. But hope will not allow me to, my fandom will not lay dormant. Here are a few reasons why the Giants might (but definitely, probably WILL NOT) tie things up in the NL West:

Exhibit A: The Dodgers have hit a speed bump lately. They lost a series to the Pirates and Kershaw lost at home. Now they are, at best, about to lose a series to the Diamondbacks. I'm pretty sure this hasn't happened all season, as the Giants are the only team in the NL West to lead a season series against the Dodgers. Granted, sometimes the Dodgers starting pitching beyond Kershaw and Greinke looks about as great as the Giants, but still. Paul Goldschmidt was a darling and decided to save his home runs for LA and not San Francisco. He is doing good work, that annoyingly amazing man. But I digress. Greinke was just listed as being scratched tonight with calf soreness. The Dodgers other starting options are not great, which means Arizona could possibly sweep. This would help.

Exhibit B: The Giants schedule is favorable, including a series against the A's. The A's could help the Giants get within 4 games of the division by the time the Dodgers come to town. That would make the Dodger series more meaningful, and possibly, at the very least, not allow the Dodgers to clinch the NL West in San Francisco. Until the Dodgers recent troubles, that was all I'd asked for.

Exhibit C: The Giants have the ability to go on an inexplicable hot streak. Yes, the Dodgers would also have to continue their struggles, but I've seen far weirder things than that. If the Giants can win a World Series without Angel Pagan and Matt Cain while having Travis Ishikawa as their left fielder, anything is possible. Hell, that's the kind of thing that makes me believe in unicorns. With all that said, it wouldn't be easy for the Giants to do this, but still, remotely possible.

I'm guessing that Dodger fans feel about the Giants how Mets fans feel about the Nationals: you know a different outcome than what's predicted is highly unlikely, but you're still worried. You're still looking over your shoulder, wondering, even if logic says otherwise. So I'm hoping against logic and predictability, because the Giants have had a stupid season, damn it. And the stupidest way of all to end it would be to win the NL West. The Giants (and hope in sports teams) are like a bag of Skittles you find under your car seat; you know they're probably bad, but you just love Skittles so much, you can't help but have some.

The Giants = Family Healing

I've been a fan of the Giants going as far back as I can remember. It's in my blood. Despite this, I came to my current rabid fandom only within the last ten years or so. I was living out of state during the horrors of the 2002 World Series, keeping up with it, but thankful that I did not have cable at the time. Everyone in my family is a Giants fan except one of my two brothers. He was never a sports guy, and if he enjoyed any sport at all, it was hockey. Certainly not baseball.

My feelings about the Giants aren't necessarily unique, but proof that sports can be healing. Championships can make the unbearable seem survivable, if only for a few weeks. My brother, the non-Giants/sports fan, died in 2009 from metastatic melanoma at 34. I was living in Los Angeles at the time of his diagnosis, and spent a lot of time driving back and forth between there and home to be with him. At that time I didn't have cable and other than the internet (I wasn't on Twitter at that point), my main source of baseball information was the sports section of the Sunday edition of the LA Times. Suffice to say, at that point, baseball was the furthest thing from my mind. The seven months between my brother's diagnosis and this death were the worst seven months of my life.  I was certain for at least an entire year that I could never feel any kind of joy again. For anything. 

While the first half of the 2010 Giants season was a bit of a blur (my life was a blur at that point), I remember the second half pretty well. If the Giants had won their first World Series title in San Francisco during 2009, I wouldn't have been able to really enjoy or appreciate it. It would've been too soon. But this was 2010, when we all needed something positive to hold onto. I can't properly explain what the Giants meant to my family in 2010, even if most of us couldn't verbalize it. When the Giants won the NL West division in September, it was the first time I'd felt alive in a long time, which had to do both with my brother's death and other things from the last few years. 

What's odd about 2010 is that what I remember most, besides the last out of the NLCS (which I got to experience with a fellow Giant fan) and the World Series, is Thanksgiving a few weeks after the World Series was over. My family had something positive to talk about, something great bringing us together. If my brother had been a Giants fan, I would've perhaps felt guilty that he wasn't there to see it. It would've been bittersweet somehow. But he wasn't a Giants fan, and yet I felt in some small way that he had something to do with the Giants finally winning a World Series in San Francisco that year. Like he was looking out for us in some weird way. I know that makes sense to no one but me, but it's the things you tell yourself when you go through something like that. It's the only way to make sense of the absurd.

We were no less confounded by the two World Series titles the Giants have won since 2010 when we got together for those Thanksgivings. We might be baffled by different players, but the song is the same. The Giants are in some way responsible for my family being able to survive the worst experience of our lives and I will be forever grateful to them for that. And flat-out bewildered. 

I Have No Idea What The Giants Should Do This Offseason (And Neither Do You)

It takes a team like the San Francisco Giants to remind you that you don't know much about a particular sport. At least you don't as far as acquisitions and trades are concerned. I have read countless articles since the World Series ended (I still can't comprehend that the Giants won it AGAIN) about what kind of offseason moves the Giants should make, will make, etc. and I can see any one of the possibilities mentioned happening; I can also need none of the possibilities happening. Writers with experience covering the Giants should know better than anyone that you simply cannot anticipate what Brian Sabean and company will do. And last year's World Series title further proves that there is no formula or pattern that works for this team.

Here are some obvious holes the Giants need to address (or have in weird ways):

Third Base: I can't even talk about Pablo Sandoval going to Boston because it's too soon. I can't even decide what to do with the garden gnome made in his likeness that's still sitting in our sunroom. Sigh. But the Giants have traded for Casey McGehee for some reason, so that's taken care of. How well it will actually work remains to be seen, but it's better than Matt Duffy/Juaqin Arias/whoever. And McGehee is a free agent after 2015, so not much harm is done. It's an even year this season though, so our new third basemen could play out in any number of ways. *shrugs*

Starting Pitching: Now that the Giants have re-signed Jake Peavy (yay!) I would think re-signing Ryan Vogelsong would be just down the road. Maybe they try to get a James Shields too? After being snubbed by Jon Lester, I don't know how good the Giants chances are of getting a decent free agent pitcher. If Matt Cain is healthy this season (that's a BIG if, obviously) and even if the Giants don't sign any other starting pitcher, the idea of a rotation with Bumgarner, Cain, Peavy, Hudson and Lincecum isn't the worst ever. But which Tim Lincecum are we going to get? That big question mark should motivate the Giants to sign at least one of other reliable starter but only Larry Baer and Brian Sabean know who that will be. Also, no one knows how well Tim Hudson will hold up in the final year of his contract (and most likely, his last year in baseball) so an added starter would help alleviate any potential problems he might have.

Left Field: Not surprisingly (though I'm still a bit bummed) Michael Morse did not re-sign with the Giants and instead went to the Marlins. I wasn't really expecting the Giants to re-sign him, but he sure made an impact in 2014, despite his injuries during most of the second half of the season. I'll miss the big fella, but the Giants do need someone to platoon with Gregor Blanco who is not just Juan Perez/Gary Brown/whoever. Yes, 2015 is an even year, so if you're going to try that silly idea out, it might as well be now…but do you NEED to? I'm still holding out hope for Ben Zobrist, though honestly I'm more into his cool name than him as a player. And much like the starting rotation being unsettled with Matt Cain coming back from injury, we won't know how the outfield will look until Angel Pagan is really back in action. Mr. Zobrist looks like the most viable candidate right now and his name has been linked to the Giants for awhile, so who knows. Just leave Andrew Susac out of it, Mr. Sabean. Please.

All that having been said, January is a dark time for fans of any baseball team. You've gotten through December, but Spring Training still feels a long way off. And, if you're like me, you feel clobbered by college sports. Sigh.

Why Clayton Kershaw Being NL MVP Makes Total Sense

Clayton Kershaw winning the NL MVP award this year is the definition of a dilemma for me. It truly is. I'm straddling the fence with my feelings about it, constantly going back and forth, mostly between what I know (statistics and who the MVP award is for) and what I feel (who he plays for, why I love the sport, etc.). This is where a For/Against list comes in handy to explain myself, though I'm not sure I will end up feeling much better about this afterward, but I might. Let's try it. It's a process, people.

FOR/AGAINST = WHAT I KNOW

FOR CLAYTON KERSHAW WINNING NL MVP

The Dodgers were 23-4 in games he started this season
The Dodgers won the last 21 games of the season in which he pitched
His ERA was under 2 (!?!?!?!?!?)
His WHIP was under 1 (!?!?!?!?!)
The remainder of the Dodgers rotation pitched to a team ERA of over 4
198 innings pitched is A LOT for a pitcher who missed at least 4 weeks of the season
Hitters were 0-4 with the bases loaded against him THE ENTIRE SEASON
I can't think of any other player on the Dodgers more valuable than he was this season
I can't think of any other pitcher on any other team more valuable than he was this season
He faced more batters than Giancarlo Stanton or Andrew McCutchen had plate appearances (though if neither of them had been hurt this year this wouldn't been made the list)

AGAINST CLAYTON KERSHAW WINNING NL MVP

He missed 4 weeks of the season, only throwing 198 innings
His missing 4 weeks gave him more stamina at the end of the season
He pitched every fifth day

FOR/AGAINST = WHAT I FEEL

FOR CLAYTON KERSHAW WINNING NL MVP

He's the single greatest pitcher I've ever seen in my life
He's one of the reasons I love baseball and pitching specifically
His curveball is the equivalent of baseball porn to me
He's a model athlete: talented, humble, hard-working, fun-loving, not a jerk

AGAINST CLAYTON KERSHAW WINNING NL MVP

He pitches for the Dodgers, duh
Pitchers shouldn't win regular season MVP awards
The Dodgers had Sandy Koufax and Orel Hershiser, they don't need more damn pitching awards
Dodger fans shoving it in Giants fans faces endlessly
Hearing the Justin Verlander comparisons on winning MVP/Cy Young in same season

That might not be much to look at, but the end result helps reiterate why I'm so conflicted on Kershaw winning the MVP award. He's so unbelievably, ridiculously good and plays for a team that I hate with the passion of 1000 suns. Ugh. Just ugh. BUT HOLY CRAP I LOVE WATCHING HIM PITCH SO GOD DAMN MUCH IT HURTS.

National League Wild Card Game: Embrace The Barfiness!

Are the Giants screwed tomorrow? Probably! But let's talk about it because talking is fun. Now is as good a time as any to just get real, especially when it comes to a one-game, do-or-die Wild Card scenario. Most fans probably think their team is screwed and statistically speaking, most of those fans are 50% right. But those fans are also 50% wrong.

Normally, I love to have all kinds of stats to back up my sports-related arguments, especially when it comes to baseball. I don't need BABIP (cool anagram, though) or FIP, but ERA, WHIP, OBP, these stats mean something. Regarding tomorrow's National League Wild Card game though, I can only rely on previous performance and gut instincts. Neither of these factors make me feel very good about the Giants chances against the Pirates, but I don't think my team is necessarily doomed. Here are my "Keys To The Game":

1. PITCHING PITCHING PITCHING: This is a key for both teams and in pretty equal measure. The Giants are facing the "new" Edinson Volquez tomorrow, but even if he is better now than he used to be, he's still the preferred pitcher for the Giants to face over Gerrit Cole or Francisco Liriano. He's the least of all evils, if you will. If Madison Bumgarner pitches as well tomorrow as he's pitched on the road lately, the Pirates could be in a big trouble. He is the guy the Giants want out there and despite loving what Jake Peavy has done for the Giants this second half of the season, Bumgarner is who you want. Bumgarner just has to pound the strike zone (no nibbling or junk pitches!), hope the Pirates swing and miss (close your eyes when McCutchen or Harrison come up) and for God's sake, don't walk anybody. Also, the bullpens for both these teams have been scary good this year, so that's fun.

2. DEFENSE DEFENSE DEFENSE (and DEFENSE!): As with pitching, both the Giants and Pirates are great teams defensively. A one-game playoff will likely be determined by a key defensive play, and I think both teams are ready for that, though perhaps the Pirates slightly more than the Giants. Why? Because the Pirates have won (and lost) a lot of games this season by one or two runs and they know how to win games by that small of a margin. In addition, the Giants are taking a bit of a gamble by putting Travis Ishikawa in left field, which while a better bet than Morse, still might not pay off. So, in that regard, the Pirates have the slight edge. But Ishikawa can hit, so the risk must be taken.

3. KEEP DOING WHAT WORKS: Sounds simple enough, right? Well, maybe. Maybe not. What works for the Giants is solid pitching (giving up 2 runs or fewer), excellent defense and not trying too hard at the plate. Whatever Gregor Blanco has been doing in the second half of the season really works, so hopefully that continues tomorrow. Giants fans also have to hope that Hunter Pence starts hitting again NOW and that good things continue to happen with Joe Panik and Buster Posey. Oh, and Brandon Belt not striking out in key situations would be helpful too. Patience, my good boy. Patience!

4. HOPE MOMENTUM IS REALLY A THING: Is momentum real? An illusion? Who knows, but right now, the Giants definitely have it over the Pirates, for whatever that's worth. The Pirates saw their division crown hopes go up in flames by losing the final series of their season to the Reds, and on a grand slam by a non-power hitter, no less. The Pirates' previously great bullpen made just a few bad pitches, so they lost their chance at the division tie-breaker game against the Cardinals. On the flip side, the Pirates are looking for redemption. Pirates = redemption, Giants = continue momentum. Which is more dangerous to be facing? It's a toss-up.

5. REMEMBER YOUR POSTSEASON EXPERIENCE: This is really where the advantage lies for the Giants over the Pirates. And that advantage does count for something, especially when you consider how many 2012 World Series players are still with the Giants now: Crawford, Belt, Posey, Blanco, Pence, Sandoval. Yes, this is a road game for the Giants, but it's not like they haven't been in elimination scenarios before; they OWNED elimination scenarios in 2012. They are as ready for this game as they've been all season.

6. STOP PRETENDING YOU KNOW HOW THIS WILL TURN OUT: This is perhaps the most important key to the game tomorrow. None of us really know how this will go down. We can assume that because of the pitching on both sides that it will be a low-scoring, defense-heavy game. But no one assumed the Giants would do anything in 2010 and 2012, and they have two World Series titles to show for it. Yet it could also be a blowout for either team. Anything could happen at any moment.

It's terrifying. It's exciting. It's vomit-inducing. But it's SO FUN, isn't it? At the very least, isn't it better than the alternative? Because no fan wants a postseason-less year. Or whatever. Go get 'em, boys!

Petit threw a gem and now I kind of believe

After Yusmeiro Petit's near-perfect game against the Diamondbacks last year (it still stings), it seemed feasible he could do something similar in another start against them. This was a Diamondbacks team without Paul Goldschmidt, after all. Save giving up a home run to Ender Inciarte (not a real name, by the way), Petit almost did it again. A complete game on 84 pitches seems impossible, except when you consider who Petit threw it against. Even factoring in the opponent, Petit's performance and Joe Panik's five-hit night makes you believe this team is capable of real greatness. Panik is reminding me so much of Marco Scutaro and Freddy Sanchez that I'm starting to worry, but that's neither here nor there. I won't start to really Panik (get it? hah) until the postseason. While not always consistent, considering what Petit has had to do and in the manner he's had to do it in, he's been fantastic for the Giants. Looking back at the whole season, I consider him one of the most underrated components of the team.

The Giants have a remaining schedule that, except for six games against the Dodgers, makes for a real race in the NL West up until the final day of the regular season. Granted, the Dodgers have an equally "easy" schedule, but they also lost a series to the Cubs this year, and Yasiel Puig is going through a slump. What do we have to do to ensure that that slump lasts through the end of the month? On paper the Dodgers are clearly the better team, but they have the same depth issues the Giants do, just with a crapload more money in their bank account. The Dodgers actually claimed Roberto Hernandez (or Fausto Carmona, whichever you prefer) for some reason and he has been pretty terrible, Josh Beckett probably won't pitch again and Dan Haren is, well, Dan Haren. Relying that heavily on already worn-out pitchers like Kershaw, Greinke (which autocorrected to Grinch! so perfect!) and Ryu might not work out the way they want it in the end. It is the offense you really have to worry about with the Dodgers, especially since Adrian Gonzalez is on a tear again and so is Carl Crawford, kind of. But who can say how long it will last.

If you want a sign that the Dodgers are not that secure with their division lead, look no further than the pitching lineup they have for BOTH of their remaining series against the Giants: Ryu, Grienke, Kershaw. Rinse and repeat. Save Hernandez and Haren for the Padres and Cubs, I suppose. In fact, that's pretty much been their pitching rotation against the Giants most of the season and in light of it, the Giants have done pretty well against their rivals this year. The last series of the year for the Giants is the Padres, which should ring some bells for even more recent Giants fans. It will be a fun second half of the month and if the Giants have more games like last night, they can make a run for it; another NL West title is in their grasp. Will Lincecum pitch against the Padres the last week of September? GOD I HOPE SO!

Cespedes/Lester Trade: Good for Business, Bad for Morale

While the Giants are definitely my team in baseball, I've always liked the A's, especially the last 3 years. Back in May, I discovered there was a weekend September series where the A's were playing the Astros. I was excited about going to the game, mostly because I always wanted to see Jose Altuve in person, but also because I wanted to see Yoenis Cespedes in person. He was one of the main reasons I'd enjoyed the A's so much during the last two years. Despite his short service time, he quickly became "The Face of the Franchise" and probably the only player most baseball fans could name on the A's, or at least those fans who didn't follow the team.

Fast forward to now, September 2014, and the A's are a team down their only Cuban. Giants fans know better than most that pitching wins World Series titles, but it's safe to say that everyone in the baseball world was surprised when Billy Beane traded Cespedes to the Red Sox for postseason pitching king Jon Lester. Even without Lester, the A's pitching staff looked pretty solid, what with the acquisition of Cubs ace Jeff Samardzija before the July 31st deadline. And yes, the A's pitching staff looked far better with Lester on it. That is obvious.

Here is the problem with all of this: at its core, baseball is a business. That fact cannot be denied. It simply is. Billy Beane made a business decision in trading Cespedes and from that standpoint, it was brilliant. Cespedes had one year left on his contract before free agency and Beane traded him when his value was at its highest, in order to gain the highest value back, which he did (despite Lester being a two month rental). The A's would not have been able to keep Cespedes once his contract was done and everyone knew that, so Cespedes departing the A's at some point was inevitable. However, from a morale standpoint, there was nothing good about this trade. Part of the reason the A's had done so well in the last few years, much like the Giants at their peak, was team chemistry. They had the same group of players, no superstars, no divas. Were it not for Justin Verlander, the A's certainly would have gone to the World Series at least twice in the last three years.

So, a month removed from the Cespedes/Lester trade, where are the A's now? Oh, just five games back in the AL West, when prior to the trade they were either first or tied for first. After a short adjustment period, Cespedes seems to be settling in well in Boston, with 24 RBIs in his first 30 games with his new team. If the Red Sox can rebuild next season, he will be a big reason for their likely future success. Of course, timing is everything; Cespedes was traded at a time when many A's players were "coming back down to earth", as many position players do this time of the season. Were the A's struggling before the trade? At times they were, but not to this extent and not at such a crucial time.

Can the A's recover from this mammoth transaction? They seem to think that acquiring Adam Dunn as an end-of-the-season push was an answer to that question, but I'm not so sure. With the pitching that Dunn is likely to see in the postseason, he might not be. But then again, this is the A's, who are experts at turning around seemingly average players into heroes. Who knows.

All of that said, I still don't like the trade. Not one bit.